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As if Valentine’s Day wasn’t enough of a terrible holiday, the Bronx Zoo in New York has made the lovable holiday synonymous with the most unlovable animal possible; the cockroach. “This year, we are offering the opportunity to purchase and name a cockroach as a Valentine’s gift for your significant other”, says Bronx Zoo manager Jim Breheny. “After all, you can’t spell romance without ‘love’”.

Purchasing a cockroach package at the gift shop costs about $15, however, the “full experience”, as defined by the Zoo can cost as mush as $75! The full experience includes “an official certificate commemorating the roach as well as a virtual visit with the roach under a microscope”. “This cockroach visit, we hope, will relive guests of a stress of being in a relationship”, says Breheny. “Many guests even name cockroaches after their exes!”.

Cockroaches for Valentine’s Day has become a traditions in other areas as well. The San Diego Zoo features the “Cry Me a Cockroach” fundraiser which involves guests naming roaches after their exes and seeing the roach being devoured by animals soon after. Even Business Waste companies are offering the option of naming a trash bin after their ex or significant other whether as a joke or whenever their relationship goes “awry”.

“Love is in the zoo”, the Bronx Zoo says in a Twitter post, “and there is no better time to name a Madagascar cockroach for your special someone. You may not have the right words but you can still give your significant other goosebumps. Just don’t let it hiss under your bed tonight”.

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