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Am I so jaded that I cannot watch a love story without venom filling my blood
Have I been so wronged that the sight of someone else’s happiness brings me to madness
To see them laugh
To see them smile
To see them hug
Bile fills my throat
When did I become the me that I am today
So angry
So bitter
So hateful
Was there a time in my life that I could look back on
Or was the whole thing a shit show from the beginning
Have I always been this way
Or did I once long for romance
Did I see myself finding my prince charming
Would I find my soulmate in a unique and memorable way
Maybe I would trip and fall and he would catch me
And our love would blossom
We would dance and sing together
Maybe I saw myself falling for the least expected guy
The one who I couldn’t stand at first but there was just something about him
One day he would be there when I needed him and I would realize
That true love was right before me all along
Did I imagine a happily ever after for me
Or have I always been
This cynical
This contemptuous
This pessimistic
I may never know
Should I take the knowledge I have and change my ways
Should I find a way to soften my cold stone heart
The thought then becomes
Do I want too